The Other Side of School Life

I come across a lot of posts on a regular basis about how school life was the best period of their lives, how they miss it & how they wish to relive it. I feel happy for them having had a very fruitful & enjoyable time in school. But let me tell you about the other type of people who would not perhaps echo this sentiment.

In school there are some major categories of students. There are those mischievous ones who are always remembered for creating trouble in class & annoying even teachers always; there are the popular students who seem to have hundreds of friends & who are the envy of others; there are the omnipresent students seen in almost all extra-curricular activities whether cultural or sports – making a name for themselves & the school; there are the class toppers who are popular among students & teachers alike for being the brightest in studies. Then there are some students in this crowd of outshining, prominent students – who are sincere yet average, who participate in activities yet are shy, who may have but a few friends & whom not many may remember well years after school.

Yes such students exist. I am one of them. I was a sincere, a bit shy & under confident student lost in this crowd of popularity & frolic. I was popular for my sincerity but among the teachers. I was also popular during those times among select groups of popular & mischievous students, better referred to as “BULLIES” because I was too sensitive to be indifferent to their bullying & too much of a coward to stand up to them for it. I do not have too many fond memories of my school life because I haven’t enjoyed school life as most students seem to have. I was too naïve to even understand who are my actual friends & who are just using me for my meticulous notes.

I recall crying at home about not wanting to go on a school tour because I didn’t have friends to share the room with; I recall having diminishing confidence in school because of being bullied for my innocence, looks, sensitivity & sincerity; I recall not being included in the friends “groups” during sports days or when sharing insider jokes; I recall having barely a few genuine friends whom I kept in touch with even years after school because I recall being teased, annoyed, irritated & made miserable by the others.

I know that people are really immature in school. I’m sure many of these “bullies” grew up to be perfectly decent human beings in the future who probably look back on their school life with a laugh at the kind of fun they have had. It’s also possible that bullying was their defense mechanism to hide their insecurities. But while they resorted to such juvenile tactics of annoying others to mask their own insecurities, there is a mass of students who grew up hating their school life because of them & probably fearing every moment they spent in school with them – a mass who may or may not have the courage or gain confidence to progress as well in life simply because their confidence was crushed by these bullies in the childhood.

I consider myself lucky. Because I had no major repercussions of that school torment. I grew up to be still an average person but with a lot more guts & confidence and many more genuine friendships to carry me ahead in my personal life. But looking back I do regret giving in to all that teasing & not having the confidence to stand up to the bullies & probably improving things for a few more students like me.

So people who post about “Take me back to the carefree school days” – good for you, but I’m sorry I can’t relate to that sentiment. And many others may not be able to. And if you can relate to having enjoyed teasing other students & laughing at their misery then the reason might just be you.

And to people who have been at the receiving end of all this, don’t worry – you are not alone. And I promise you, you will find better people in life who will be genuine, caring, loving & empathetic. Just don’t lose that confidence in yourself. You are an amazing person who can get a life you deserve.